Monday, April 26, 2010

April 25th, 2010 - Sunday

Since this blog entry is my last one, I thought it’d be nice if I dedicated it to my reflections on my experiences abroad. I have to say that it took me a little bit longer to love Vienna as compared to the other places I’ve been to in Europe. I think part of that is due to the fact that I had to view it as a place I would be living in for the next three months. The first time I got out in the city, I questioned a lot whether I would love here and be comfortable, instead of just seeing it for what it is. Now I love it!! I don’t feel like going back yet.

When I signed up for this program, my expectations were that I would turn out to be less scared of being in new situations, and that I would deal better with the change that occurs with them. I’m just a very, very cautious person (like Bobby once said to me), and I rarely engage in something when I’m not sure of the outcome. If I manage to imagine what it would be like, what I do next is that I keep breaking it apart to find where I would fail. That alone made me feel that I would not be able to handle it. Then since, I only count on myself to clean my mess, I just end up not doing it when I feel it might be too much. During this trip, I have not only come to the recognition that this is what I do, but I think I’m now a little bit less like that. I’m more willing to experience something new without having the development contained in my mind. I feel like I trust myself to be able to handle whatever comes my way a little bit more.

In summary, regarding self-discovery, this trip opened my eyes to not only things I need to improve about myself, but also to qualities that I already have within me. The past few years I neglected thinking about what my strengths are because I would always be focused on my imperfections and self-improvement. It is with this recognition that I think I’ve come to trust myself with myself a little bit more.

Although I want to relate every detail of this trip that contributed to my inner self, I know it would be impossible to do that. I could try to relate my awe moments, but there are so many. All I can do is just say that there were and that my pictures cannot even translate everything I’ve experienced in that moment. I enjoyed and loved most of the places I’ve been to. I now have a long list of things to look into by what I’ve been able to see. I could go on forever, so why not stop here. Big thanks to my family, bisous!!!


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